What about my daughter that’s autistic with an IQ of 124 but impulse control of a child 3 years younger than herself. I often feel she needs a certain level of structure I wasn’t prepared for. My neurotypical son really thrives with the free play approach

I skipped kindergarten this year for my 5 year old, because it was full-time. Because he wasn’t six before the new year, I didn’t have to register him. He had an amazing year. He played, he rested. We never had to deal with after school meltdowns from “keeping it together” all day. We did “work”, as he has never attended preschool either (besides a one day farm school). The work consisted of following a guiding “teach your child to read book” and a few other worksheets for handwriting, etc… It took about 3-4 mornings a week for no more than 45 minutes. And he is on the same level as his friends who attended school. Besides that, it was learning through play!

After working with children for over 20 years, I believe this academic push is tied to more anxious children, more meltdowns from exhaustion (kids are always on the go), more children looking to adults to tell them what to do and how to do it (they go from school to extracurricular activities directed by adults). When I first started working with children, it wasn’t this way. I feel so passionate about it (after seeing a negative impact) that I was bound and determined to give my children a simple childhood.

That’s not a privileged statement! These are parents and caretakers doing the best they can for their children in their family’s unique situation(s). Don’t assume that a parent who doesn’t want to send their child to all-day kindergarten is looking down on others who want to send their children all day or who have to; and do not look down on them for expressing their worries in this constructive manner, either!

I agree! Life is stressful enough without putting more pressure on our youngest! They need playful exercise and learning to play with other children.

Well that sure is a privileged statement. Many families have to have two working parents to get by, and once school ends they have to pay extra for child care. And if there are older siblings, two different pick up times creates an extra hardship. That is why several states have now passed a law that requires schools to offer full day kindergarten. I do not believe that anyone is required to keep there kinders there full day, it’s just an option for the many parents who need it.

https://www.ecs.org/kindergarten-policies/

I came from a home that was very strict and isolating and want really asked to be a child. I want my daughter to learn as a child should through play and curiosity, and if she makes a mess at least she likes helping to clean it up!

Another Grandma here. I so agree with you. In fact, 5 Years is the bare minimum. I’d say 55 years. lol

I nanny a girl who is in a montessori program 3 days/week. She just turned 3. One day, I asked what she played with at school. She looked at me like I had 2 heads and said, “I didn’t play. I do work in school. ”
While I know there are pros and cons of montessori (I also worked at a montessori school for a year), this stood out to me.

It’s hard because all families want what’s best for their child and it can be a struggle to trust your child and not rush into formal teaching in the early years.

What state?