Sara, you haven’t done anything wrong. Under 2’s need you to hover as they haven’t yet developed a sense of permanency. You are at just the right age in his life now to begin to give him a little space. He will panic at first as he has to learn that you don’t disappear when you go away. Games like peeka-boo will help him. You would of damaged him if you hadn’t hovered. Just watch a cat with her kittens she will stay with them almost continually until they start to explore and then leave them for really short times after that. You have done the right thing x

You are our soul.

You are our passion.

You are our ‘raison d’être’.

We live to reach you and your needs.

We preach to reach your soul.

We understand children.

We understand family.

There is no better time than today.

There is no better time than now.

There is no better time than us together.

There is no better time to let go.

There is no better time to breath and smile.

They are your children and they will become themselves better without you!

Thank you so much Vicki! We have similar passions. 🙂

I love this: When the mother does well, the children do well.
Thanks for your website and your work you do! You’re making a difference!

I love your realization here. You are right. This is exactly how they pass down from generation to generation. Your mother’s hovering made you anxious about that area, so you hover too. It is the awareness you have just gained that starts to break the cycle. So congratulations on starting that process. That is awesome.

Thank you Janet. I have written several articles on this topic too. There is absolutely a tie between parental anxiety and the anxiety in children. As I have calmed my own anxiety, I have seen dramatic changes in my children.

Thank you Crystal. While I learned a lot from my mistakes, I would have loved to find it sooner. I am so glad you did.

Hi Shay, It can be hard to work out the right thing to do when there is so much turmoil on the inside. I work with parents with trauma to help calm the inner chatter that makes it hard to follow our intuition and let go. As we calm our inner world, decisions become easier to make in the outer world. Feel free to email me any time and we can discuss the situations you are struggling with. I am at beatingtrauma@gmail.com.

I had noticed there must be something I do that makes my kids unsure about some things they must be able doing confidently by themselves by now (considering other things they do by themselves). But it made no sense to me why they do it only with some activities and not others. My youngest, almost 4, dresses herself for example, or asks my help, but never makes her own drinks or food. She even panics when I leaves her room to do it herself. Why was that? I couldn’t figure it out.
You post provides me the answer: I’m partially hovering! On the subjects my autistic mother was weird on, like food and drinks, spilling and smudging. Those are obviously still so impending that I can’t give my free range kids space there… oh so sad…!
This is (also) how certain things pass down generations I believe.
I’ll surely use your tips. Thank you so much!