Plus I’ve bought 2 of Magda Gerber’s books and can’t wait to read them after I read yours… I also finally found, through a blogger (I believe), whose link you posted, a book which I always had HOPED existed: “The Joyful Child”, about following a Montessori based approach while caring for children from birth until the age of 3 or so. I had become a fan of the Montessori method 20 years before I had my first child! And now, 15 months after my daughter’s birth, I am combining my interest in Montessori with a fascination with RIE. Thank you thank you thank you. My daughter, my husband and I are lucky to have found you!

P.S. I read NO books about raising children during my pregnancy, and none during my daughter’s first year. I much preferred following my own intuition, and knew that we’d both be the better for it. I still feel that way. I think that a peaceful grounding based on intuition and based on being child-centered, literally (i.e. let HER guide me and let us BOTH smell the roses…) is what has worked so well for us until the present day. And the nice thing is, centering oneself and using one’s intuition isn’t, in fact, “work”! What I love about the Montessori method and what I love about what I’ve read of RIE so far is that they are both so aligned with my own intuition — with my deepest feelings and beliefs about my daughter, me, and my family and humanity in general.

You give such great ideas – thank you!

I am not a parent, but I started following your blog a few months ago because I wanted better tools for strengthening my confidence and interactions with my nieces. I continue to find that here, but also observations about being human.

This post has left me chewing on the idea of what it means to invite people to participate in the experiences at hand, and why do we sometimes think that we’ll show up for/participate in the carefully curated, pleasurable activities (like The Weekend, or seeing a horse for the first time), but we’ll check out for the rest of it (the mundane parts, the painful parts, the boring parts, etc.)

When I rush through the store, I think I’m not even inviting *myself* to participate in the experience (and I’m not even bringing kids into the mix!). And I think this is a widespread tendency for many of us—to try to “get through” the tasks of our lives. Right now I am trying to reprogram this tendency in myself, and I get a chuckle when I realize: what would be the reward of “getting through” my life as quickly as possible? It’s as if I’m hurrying to “get the whole thing over with,” which doesn’t make any sense if “the whole thing” is my life! 🙂

It’s true that depending on the rhythm of my life at any given time, sometimes I have to rush, but a lot of times I really don’t, and a task like taking the compost to the dropoff site a few blocks away becomes a welcome moment to just show up and be alive. “I am here on this sidewalk. The trees look like this. The sun feels like this. I feel like this. The cart sounds like this. The compost smells like this.”

Thanks for the posts! They’ve been great, both for thinking about the small people in my life, and for just thinking about people, full stop.

Melissa, I love your attitude. Keep up the wonderful work!