Comments on: The Secret to Getting out the Door with a Resistant Child https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/ elevating child care Sat, 16 Sep 2023 22:23:50 +0000 hourly 1 By: Amy Taylor https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-132937 Sat, 16 Sep 2023 22:23:50 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-132937 In reply to Ashleigh.

Yep I know children such as this! It can be maddening if you don’t have the time to sit and wait for them to be finished. As long as it was safe I would let them pretend. You can say something like “I don’t want you to touch these parts of the car” so that they are aware of how you feel. Wait for them to stop, don’t say anything…maybe check your phone or whatever. When they finally stop then just get out of the car and go on with your day.

]]> By: Amy Taylor https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-132936 Sat, 16 Sep 2023 22:17:37 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-132936 In reply to Kara.

His “making into a game” seems to me that he is searching for some control or influence. I have experienced children who do this as well, and if you cannot play along then it’s just unfortunate. It is a sign that your life is not your own, that you are beholden to outside forces. Life should be full of choices and possibilities and our children are pushing us to live this way whether we feel we are able to or not. Good luck!

]]> By: Amy Taylor https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-132935 Sat, 16 Sep 2023 22:13:34 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-132935 In reply to Anna.

In my experience, boundaries are good to communicate, but it is not always good to force or cajol or convince others to comply. If they are capable, they will, for the most part.

]]> By: Cally https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-132265 Fri, 09 Sep 2022 21:32:12 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-132265 Hi,
I have a 5 year old, who attends daycare/preschool 5 days per week, she has been going since she was a baby, is social and enjoys going. I have issues every morning getting her to get ready for the day, there is a lot of refusal to get dressed,brush teeth etc, she often wants to pretend to be a baby or animal – this usually results in me being late for work and I feel like a pressure cooker of frustration trying to get organised in the morning – I literally don’t know how to get her on board with getting ready so we are not late. Any advice?

]]> By: Rama https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-131194 Thu, 10 Feb 2022 18:52:07 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-131194 Hi, I like your article and approach. Thank you for enlightening us.

I have a 3 year old granddaughter who is resistant to learning the sounds of the alphabet and learning in general. If I show her flash cards and ask her what is in the picture, she will joke and not answer my question.

How do I handle this resistance?

She is good at playing memory cards and doing jigsaw puzzles.

Thanks in advance.

]]> By: Rosie https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-130796 Tue, 19 Oct 2021 19:16:57 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-130796 I have had this approach for the past few weeks and my 3 year old has not been in once. She was so good at going in originally as I waited with her until she was ready to go in by herself, and I was ready to collect incase she changed her mind, so she had the confidence to be there. she’s been going for a year confidently. Unfortunately things seem to have changed and now she seems very unsettled. She was sick just before this change and so we stayed off having a self care day but now she doesn’t want to go back. I am at a loss as to how to approach this carefully and mindfully. She has had a change at school and is now in pre school instead of nursery (this was a while before she was sick). She has also become very irritable and short tempered at home no matter how much effort we put into validating feelings and giving her more one on one time. She is still napping most days, if she misses a nap she falls asleep in her evening meal. She has also gone backwards in potty training (which she initiated in the first place) and is now back in pull ups. Any advise would be greatly appreciated.

]]> By: Sharan https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-130673 Sun, 12 Sep 2021 12:44:33 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-130673 Hi Janet, from memory I’m pretty sure you have more than one child but I don’t recall the age difference. We have a 3 year old, a 16 month old and one on the way. I found it easier to implement these strategies when my 16 month old was younger & I could focus my time on my toddler. I’m interested in learning from your experience how you have tried to manage children’s competing needs that have to be addressed almost at the same time.

]]> By: Sharan Kaur https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-130672 Sun, 12 Sep 2021 12:37:15 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-130672 In reply to Gabby.

Great question! I feel the same.

]]> By: Kati https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-128479 Thu, 06 Feb 2020 16:37:59 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-128479 In reply to Adie.

Adie, that was a beautiful and relevant reply. Thank you for modeling how an adult employing RIE acknowledges feelings but stays unruffled. My son turns 25 this week and even though I had never heard of RIE back then, I DID remember the things I wished for as a child…to be heard and respected, and apologized to if appropriate, and to be allowed to be upset rather than smacked for it. So, I used that remembrance to raise my son and we have a very beautiful relationship and very unlike the one he has with his father who held beliefs similar to the person you responded to…my son has said he has to “hide who I am” from his father. His father, ALSO lives in that place of fear that boils life down to getting a job. I say, “consider the lilies of the field…” and set that worry for our young children on a shelf.

]]> By: Norma https://www.janetlansbury.com/2015/09/the-secret-to-getting-out-the-door-with-a-resistant-child/comment-page-1/#comment-124279 Fri, 30 Sep 2016 15:50:46 +0000 http://www.janetlansbury.com/?p=15819#comment-124279 Our 3 year old daughter entered pre-k 3 and is very attached to the lead teacher (there are 3) who is the warmest. Whenever she steps out of the classroom to eat, use the bathroom, make copies thru’out the day she cries. It’s been a month. They’ve tried telling her to make a surprise picture for her teacher when she returns and she just cries. Any suggestions? thank you!

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