Comments on: Another Parenting Magic Word (And 7 Ways It Works)

By: Jenny

Jenny — Thu, 27 Jan 2022 03:36:14 +0000

I could agree more. I had to take my 14 month old in to get a blood test. I talked this through with him in advance explain what would happen and why. When we got in there I explained step by step before each part would happen. He sat in my lap as I held him, one nurse held his arm and the other nurse gave him the injection. He just watched the whole thing without a so much as a peep. The nurses both commented how lovely I was talking with him. I asked do many babies not cry and they replied he was the first. I honestly believe it was because he was prepared and knew what was coming.

By: Melissa

Melissa — Tue, 21 Jul 2020 11:51:49 +0000

Hello, are there situations when you wouldn’t use the prepare strategy? I remember reading in another post – stop being a captive to your child’s emotions – where a mother was finding it hard to get her children out the door and would give them a warning and you suggested not giving the warning and letting them know then and there it was time to leave. Would you also use this to prepare kids for a consequence- for example if you aren’t able to stop throwing the toy I’ll put it away. Or is this used in the wrong situation because it’s coming from a place of trying to manipulate the behaviour?

By: Vicki Burgess

Vicki Burgess — Thu, 02 Jul 2015 00:20:23 +0000

The guidance instructor for Early Childhood Education taught her students about what she calls, One Finger Touch! Young children are so sensory oriented. Touching is how they learn about their world. I have utilized this with my grandchildren, and my grandgirl, now 10 years old will ask, “Can I touch this?” And if I say no, she’ll ask, “Not even a one finger touch?” Since she was a baby, I’ve showed her to use one finger to gently touch something she is curious about. My husband doesn’t like it when it comes to his very nice objects. But she has never broken anything and her behavior in shops with delicate items is respectable. One Finger Touch works! The child understands it is a gentle finger that touches the object (not picking it up), and then stops!

By: Jennifer Young

Jennifer Young — Tue, 30 Jun 2015 16:17:41 +0000

thank you

By: Beth

Beth — Mon, 23 Mar 2015 02:56:15 +0000

In reply to Wendy Lim. You're daughter will be able to understand FAR more than she can verbalize. The more you talk to her and expect her to understand the more quickly she'll begin to if she doesn't already.

By: Wendy Lim

Wendy Lim — Tue, 24 Feb 2015 07:29:05 +0000

Hi Janet,

As much as I would like to embark in this style of parenting, I have a big question. I don’t think my 23mo will understand whatever I say if I start talking to her. She is still a bit slow in picking language and she only can speak very limited words now. How should I start then?

By: Christa

Christa — Fri, 30 Jan 2015 04:49:00 +0000

In reply to janet. Thank you for the thorough reply! I will try your tips and continue to try to keep my cool.

By: Valerie

Valerie — Mon, 26 Jan 2015 21:10:16 +0000

Great post, Janet! Preparing your child is such an important step in acclimating them with life. I have found that it’s important not to over-prepare them though because if they are prepared too much and expect the same routine, change or an unexpected event can be really hard for them. As parents, it’s important to prepare ourselves too.

By: Moe

Moe — Fri, 23 Jan 2015 18:50:13 +0000

Hello Janet and other parents,

I have a very sensitive issue with my parenting and my 3 year old son.
About 2 years ago, I left my abusive husband with my 1year old (same one as listed above who is now 3) we have had several issues the father and I especially because I have a restraining order against him. We have also been going back and forth to court over this time where as it was last state in court that I the mother would have our boy for 10days then the father (whom I do not have any contact with other than when we do exchanges at a police station and the conversation is controlled for my best interest as well as the child) then the father has our boy for 4 days then I get him for 10 and so on so forth. My concerns are many but my biggest concern is that because I have a new partner on which we have a new baby girl who is 16 weeks and everything is adjusting really well, we just bought a house, getting married all of these exciting new things that family work hard for and as expected it feels like home and everyone is happy here. My new partner has been involved in the last 5 years of my life so birth of my son, leaving the abusive husband, having a new baby… Ect… My son has always called my new partner by his name and has always taken a liking to him even when he goes to his dad’s my son comes home and is great full and happy to see his step dad and greet him by his name. This last week has been extremely noticeably different he has Been calling step dad “dad” and before he would sort of do it but now he doesn’t even call him by his first name at all. I of course am touched by these little things but because this last week that’s all he says is “dad dad dad dad and mom mom mom mom” I feel this is a good thing but at the same time now he is telling me he does not want to go to his bio dad’s house anymore. Like I said there has been lots of changes to our new family lately and I’m glad that my son has a sense of stability at our new house with his new sister and calling his step dad dad, but this also concerns me because how fast it happened. It worries me also because I can not speak to the father about any of these changes (despite he fact that I have it in court orders that we have to talk about anything and everything to do with he positive development of our son his father has a serious hatred towards me and the step dad (no surprise really)). What I’m asking for is some advice or insight to see what’s caused this change with calling step dad, dad and should I be concerned about him going to his dad’s house (even though I already am especially when my son comes back and tells me how mad and cross his dad is) because he is only 3 I really need some help. any suggestions, advise, comments it’s all helpful in the end.

Thanks everyone
Moemonty@live.ca

By: Faith J.

Faith J. — Fri, 23 Jan 2015 18:00:59 +0000

I’m so grateful for learning about PREPARE when my little one was just born. I would tell him when I was about to pick him up, when I was going to put him down, where we were going next. I taught my husband to do the same. He was amazed to learn that we can show such respect to an infant and I think over the past two years it has had such a great impact on our son. We give him an hour’s notice if we are going to the doctor’s office or the barber shop, and now he has time to process it and actually looks forward to going to these formerly scary places. He is also old enough now that at the end of the day I talk about some of the highlights of that day, and he smiles and gets excited about his memories, big and small.