By: Appy

Appy — Wed, 20 Mar 2024 07:36:57 +0000

Hi Janet, I was wondering what this might look like for a 7 year old kid who is very affectionate (and also interested in other people) and sometimes gets too close for comfort. We’ve gotten this feedback from her teachers for the past 2 years and are trying to communicate this to her. However there are still several instances when she’s standing/ coming too close to a person. She’s otherwise a very kind, normal and well behaved child. Any help or scripts will be much appreciated.

By: Kiersten

Kiersten — Fri, 27 Oct 2023 11:30:49 +0000

Hi Janet I love this post, well really all your posts! I was wondering about the part that comes next after setting these boundaries with our kids, such as not climbing on grandma. My mom is a very gentle grandma who has a hard time setting boundaries with my daughter who just turned two. I often step in and say I won’t let you climb/hit/pull on grandma in that way while blocking the action or removing her from my mom. This always results in a lot of crying and struggling to get back to grandma. Do you suggest physically holding her back from grandma until she stops? That has resulted in her hitting me then and also has seemed to set this tone for her and i’s relationship because now when I come near her during playtime with grandma she always seems to think I’m the bad guy who is about to take her from grandma. I like to think I do a fairly good job of staying calm and loving while stepping in in these situations and not ever trying to blame/demean my daughter and her actions. I’ve also tried asking her if she’d like to “try again” in certain situations if her emotions are being to seem regulated again and that seems to help but sometimes she’s too on edge to handle that. I’ve also started offering alternatives like “I can’t let hit you hit grandma, I’ll come with you to grab a pillow and you can hit that!” Do you feel like that’s constructive? It obviously doesn’t always work but sometimes it seems to losses the tension in her. Also if a “melt down” is going on for awhile after being removed from a situation or removing a toy ect. Is it a bad idea to suggest the next activity we could do together? I don’t want to rush her emotions with distraction but I also think sometimes she almost gets “stuck” and benefits from a suggestion of what she can do next? Curious to hear your opinion! Thank you for all the work you do, you’ve really changed my entire relationship with my daughter and I can’t thank you enough.

Comments on: Teaching Kids About Personal Space

By: Appy

By: Kiersten