Comments on: Baby Table Manners (With Video)

By: Laura

Laura — Tue, 16 Mar 2021 17:36:22 +0000

I have seen the small table work with my 2 yr old son the few times we used it but we did not introduce until recently. I do feel a bit awkward setting up his small table next to ours while dad and I eat our dinner above him. How do you transition to everyone at the same table? I am due in 6 wks with a baby girl and could try the small table as you suggest with snacks once she is ready. Do you recommend sitting at the small table with them at first?

Another question I have after reading your books and listening to your podcasts on the matter is about seconds. My son (2 yrs) gets his meals in a partitioned plate with 3 items (veg, protein, starch usually). Often he will finish one item and ask for seconds while ignoring the other two items. We have been sticking to “we will give you seconds if you finish what is on your plate first”. This also applies to dessert (whatever fresh fruit we have). I have been trying to give small portions so that this is a reasonable rule and if he indicates he is done on the first pass (playing, trying to stand up or throwing food), we remove his meal and clean him up. But our response to his request for seconds seems to go against your method of not bribing them to clear their plate so I am wondering how you would handle this situation. I do like the idea of letting him decide how much to eat but don’t like the idea of him not getting the ‘balanced meal’. Thanks for your advice in advance!

By: Mark Jerry

Mark Jerry — Fri, 01 Jan 2021 19:26:01 +0000

Hey! I can’t see the video and I can’t find it when I click on the furniture link, what’s the problem?

By: Olivia Ava

Olivia Ava — Wed, 28 Oct 2020 19:14:13 +0000

Hi Janet! I have recently discovered RIE and find our blog so helpful. Thank you for all you do. I have a question about younger children. I have 6-month-old twins and am planning to start solids in the next couple of weeks. I am looking for good principles to start early so that we will eventually be able to have meal times that look like the video above.

By: Jessie

Jessie — Sat, 08 Feb 2020 06:32:53 +0000

Hi Janet! Great article! My daughter is 10 months, and due to limited space (500sqft apartment) we have one of those seat high chairs instead of a full high chair. My husband and I sit on the couch with our food most nights and our daughter is sat in her chair on our large (and sturdy!) coffee table in front of us. She sits up, we offer to wipe her hands, she allows us to put her bib on when offered. All great communication. Recently however, in the last week or so, my daughter has started taking items, anything really, and throwing them on the ground. Toys on the table? She will throw them on the ground. Socks on her feet while she’s sitting on my lap? She will pull them off and throw them on the ground. And then afterwards she leans over to look at it in amazement! Too interesting and cute! Butttt…she has started doing this with her food! She will be in her seat, and within seconds of food being placed in front of her she takes a piece and just drops it over the high chair. Early on I try and block the behavior and say “please keep your food on your plate while you’re eating” she tends to continue to eat but within a few minutes she starts getting more and more fidgety and instead of calmly dropping food she’s now flinging arms and hands full of food everywhere at which point I might say “if you keep throwing food then your telling me you’re all done” and if food is thrown again then I just say “okay it looks like you’re telling me you’re all done” and we clean up. I’ve read a lot of your blogs about meal Times and many of them seem to be dealing with toddlers closer to the 2 year mark. Any advice for how to deal with this behavior? Should I be saying something else due to her age? It’s also interesting that when she’s sitting in her chair or on my lap eating, if I see her take something out of her mouth and about to drop it, if I offer to take it by saying “if you’re done with that/don’t want that I can take it for you” and she will set it in my hand. Is this just a phase? Is there a different way I could/should be addressing the issue? Would moving her to a tiny table help or make things worse and more messy? Thanks for any help!

By: Sofia

Sofia — Wed, 05 Feb 2020 03:39:34 +0000

In reply to Joy S.. in childcare i have noticed that even our younger non walking babies enjoy when they sit at the table and usually they eat more than being on a high chair...also it contributes to become a member in a room and supports their social behaviour..

By: Kit

Kit — Sun, 02 Feb 2020 01:36:51 +0000

Hi, Janet. We live in a really tiny space, so there’s nowhere we can place our baby’s own table. Plus, our culture equates mealtimes to family time, so eating together is one of the practices that we do to foster family unity and togetherness. Thus, we opted for a high chair that has a setting wherein the child uses the dining table, just like us (tray is stowed away) – so she will also feel that she is an ewually heard and valued part of the family’s mealtime conversations. How do you suggest we incorporate RIE elements given our space limitations and cultural values? We’d really love to do what you suggested, but at the moment there’s just no space to maneuver.

By: janet

janet — Wed, 29 Jan 2020 15:00:18 +0000

In reply to Mei.

Hi Mei! Here’s a link to it on my YouTube channel:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hl7jlIrfsQE Hope that helps! Thanks for your interest.

By: Mei

Mei — Wed, 29 Jan 2020 12:19:14 +0000

In reply to janet. Hi Janet! I also cannot see the video - I can see the space where it should be but it's not showing up. It looks like a few of us readers are having this problem! Is there a link you include to the video in the post?

By: Loren

Loren — Sun, 01 Sep 2019 01:32:57 +0000

Love this article!
I’ve had a question which is kind of related to this subject in a way – I work in early childhood and our centre has been using the RIE approach for a few years now, removing all highchairs in favour of a small table and chairs for the babies who are able to get themselves in a sitting position and lap feeding as well as spoon feeding for those who aren’t able to sit on their own yet. (Even if they are able to remain seated when their parents sit them up).
I’ve recently started the solids journey with my own little one (6.5 months old) and have chosen to go for the baby led weaning approach as I felt that strongly was in line with many of the things that I love about RIE (respect, autonomy, independence and trust that my baby knows her body best) but one of the main indicators for readiness was to be able to sit on her own ‘relatively unassisted’. Now because I don’t sit her up during play and am waiting for her to discover that achievement on her own is it wrong to put her in a high chair? She may not sit on her own for many more months but I still would like her to be able to participate in family meals and lap feeding a baby who is feeding herself is not always ideal as it can get quite messy.

What are your thoughts on highchairs until a baby is able to get into a sitting position on her own before transitioning to a weaning table and even then spending some dinners in the high chair with family?

By: Lucy Davis

Lucy Davis — Sat, 01 Jun 2019 11:32:28 +0000

Hi Janet,

I can’t see the video. It no longer appears to be on the page? May you send it to me please? Thank you

Kind Regards
Lucy